darknovel Chapter 327 Overturned in a stinking ditch, a failed attempt to steal a chicken resulted in a loss.
Chapter 327 Overturned in a stinking ditch, a failed attempt to steal a chicken resulted in a loss.
"Oh my god! There's a ghost in the ditch!"
Just as dawn was breaking, an old farmer carrying a hoe, preparing to go to the fields, was so startled by two faint groans coming from the stinking ditch that he fell to the ground with a thud.
His shout was like stirring up a hornet's nest.
The entire Jiangjia Village seemed to have been activated, instantly coming to life.
"What's wrong? What happened?"
"Wang Laosan, what are you yelling about? It's so early in the morning!"
Within three to five minutes, a crowd of villagers had gathered around the stinking ditch at the village entrance, forming a dense, impassable blockage.
When they craned their necks and saw the "ghost" in the ditch, everyone was stunned.
Immediately afterwards, a deafening burst of laughter rose into the sky!
"Hahahaha!"
"My God! Isn't that Jianmin and his wife?"
"Did they fall into the latrine in the middle of the night, then climb out and fall into the stinking ditch?"
In the bottomless, foul-smelling muddy ditch, two human-shaped clay figures were struggling.
It was Jiang Jianmin and Sun Yumei!
The two men were covered from head to toe in a thick, sticky sludge mixture of rotten vegetable leaves and unidentified trash, their faces a kaleidoscope of colors.
Several bunches of purple grapes covered in mud still hung on Sun Yumei's hair, making it look like she was wearing a lump of moldy cow dung.
Jiang Jianmin's forehead was covered with a solid, rotten watermelon rind, the red flesh mixed with black mud, making him look like a clown who had just finished performing and hadn't removed his makeup.
The stench, a complex mixture of sludge, garbage, sweat, and leftover food fermenting together, was so strong that it made people roll their eyes even from more than ten meters away.
"Wow, this flavor is amazing!"
"What are they doing? Swimming in a cesspool?"
The villagers' gossip and ridicule were like red-hot steel needles, piercing deep into Sun Yumei's heart.
She was both ashamed and angry. She tried to climb ashore, but the ditch walls were covered with slippery moss. She used both her hands and feet to climb up a little, but then she slipped back down with a "whoosh," splashing up a cloud of foul-smelling mud, which caused another burst of laughter from the people on the bank.
Just then, the crowd automatically parted to make way.
Jiang Chen strolled over slowly, carrying a steaming cup of soy milk and a fried dough stick in his mouth.
He glanced at the two "mud men" in the ditch, who were even more disheveled than beggars, without even frowning, as if he were just looking at two stray dogs that had accidentally fallen into the mud.
"Big Gou."
Jiang Chen called out softly.
"I'm here, Brother Chen!"
Wang Dagou had been holding back his laughter for a long time, and upon hearing this, he immediately carried over a bamboo pole more than five meters long for drying clothes.
Jiang Chen took the bamboo pole, extended it into the ditch, and gently flicked the tip of the pole against Jiang Jianmin's waistband.
"Come on up, Second Uncle."
Jiang Jianmin was like a turtle that had been fished out of the water, flailing his arms and legs, when Jiang Chen forcibly lifted him out of the mud and threw him onto the grassy bank with a "plop".
Then, Jiang Chen used the same method to "fish" Sun Yumei, who was still struggling in the mud, out of the water.
As soon as the two stepped ashore, the pungent, overwhelming stench spread exponentially.
"vomit--!"
Several villagers standing in the front row couldn't hold it in any longer and covered their mouths to run to the side to dry heave.
Even the village dogs that usually love to scavenge for food in the garbage dumps, when they smelled this, tucked their tails between their legs, whimpered, and ran far away, their eyes filled with disgust.
Sun Yumei lay on the ground, feeling like all the bones in her body were about to fall apart, but then the thought of the wicked accusing the guilty first popped into her head.
Before she could speak, Jiang Chen's emotionless voice rang out first.
"Second Uncle, Second Aunt, instead of sleeping in the middle of the night, you're swimming in this stinky ditch. You've got quite the refined taste."
Sun Yumei's heart skipped a beat, but thick skin was her natural talent.
She scrambled to her feet, ignoring the mud covering her body, and began to perform, pointing to the sky and gesturing wildly.
"Oh dear! Chenzi! You have to stand up for us!"
She cried and wailed, tears streaming down her face, "I...I don't know what happened! I was sleeping soundly last night, and suddenly I started sleepwalking!"
"When I woke up, I was already in this ditch! This must be... this must be some kind of supernatural encounter!"
Her words were so convincing that Wang Dagou almost believed them if he hadn't seen the surveillance footage with his own eyes.
The surrounding villagers looked at each other in bewilderment and began to discuss among themselves.
Jiangjia Village has always had some supernatural legends, and stories of sleepwalking and encountering evil spirits actually have a certain market in rural areas.
Jiang Chen watched her clumsy performance, a playful smile curving his lips.
He didn't say a word, but simply took out his phone and winked at someone behind him.
Wang Dagou understood and immediately ran back to the village committee. In less than a minute, he brought out a huge portable projection screen and a high-lumen projector.
The device is connected.
Jiang Chen pressed the play button on his phone.
The next second, an incredibly clear surveillance image with a green night vision glow was projected onto the huge screen.
The time is 1:15 AM.
In the video, two furtive figures are seen pushing a tricycle in the rest area of the ecological park.
Immediately following was the sleazy sight of them opening the freezer and frantically loading watermelons and grapes into the car.
Even the conversation between Sun Yumei and Jiang Jianmin, who scolded Jiang Jianmin for being clumsy, and then Sun Yumei herself went to move the two air conditioners, was recorded clearly!
The footage is captured perfectly, from the moment they steal the goods, to loading them onto the vehicle, to riding to the village entrance, and then, out of nowhere, a tire blows out, the vehicle overturns, and finally, in an extremely comical manner, they both fly into a stinking ditch...
The entire process is comparable to a high-definition, uncensored, and dubbed documentary-style crime film!
The entire venue was deathly silent!
All the villagers stared at Sun Yumei as if she were a fool.
Sun Yumei's face, covered in mud, instantly turned a deep liver color, and her sobs were forced back down like a duck being choked.
Her mouth was agape, her eyes were wide open like a dead fish, and her mind was completely blank.
Finished!
Jiang Jianmin's legs went weak, and he collapsed to the ground, trembling uncontrollably, only able to stammer "I...I..."
Jiang Chen turned off the video, slowly walked up to the two of them, and took out a large calculator.
Under everyone's watchful eyes, he slowly and deliberately began to press the buttons.
"Let me do the math for you."
"Our amazing watermelons sell for 100 yuan per jin on the market. The one in your car weighs about 15 jin, so we'll call it 1,500 yuan."
"Amethyst grapes, 300 per catty. Your boxes must weigh at least 20 catties, that's 6,000."
"Peaches, two hundred each, you took thirty, that's six thousand."
"I'll give you five hundred for drinks, popsicles, and other odds and ends."
"In total, it's 14,000."
With each number Jiang Chen pressed, Sun Yumei's heart sank a little further.
"Finally," Jiang Chen's gaze fell on the pile of refrigeration units that had been smashed into scrap metal, "those are the latest industrial refrigeration units imported from Italy. I bought them through connections in the provincial capital. One unit cost 25,000 yuan, and two units cost 50,000 yuan."
He pressed the equals sign.
The calculator immediately displayed a bright red, glaring number.
"Sixty-four thousand dollars."
Jiang Chen shoved the calculator screen right in front of Sun Yumei's eyes.
"Second Aunt, I'll round it down for you, just give me 60,000."
"When will you give it to me?"
"Sixty thousand?!"
Upon hearing this number, Sun Yumei felt her vision go black and almost fainted on the spot.
Sixty thousand yuan! That would be the death of her!
She suddenly realized what was happening, and started throwing a tantrum, slapping her thighs and wailing.
"I have no money! I have no money! Just kill me! I don't have a single penny!"
"You heartless bastard! You're trying to drive your second aunt to her death! Good heavens! There's no justice in this world!"
Jiang Chen watched her roll around on the ground like a fat pig wallowing in the mud, without a trace of pity in his eyes.
"No money?"
Jiang Chen sneered.
"No money is fine too."
"Then let's settle the debt with labor."
He pointed to the row of brand-new eco-friendly dry toilets at the entrance of the village, which had just been built but had not yet been officially put into use.
"From today onwards, the two of you will be responsible for cleaning all the public toilets in the village."
"When will the 60,000 yuan in wages be paid off, and when will the settlement be complete?"